Hi.
This is what will be the first post in what is sure to be a very random collection of thoughts, rants, opinions etc. I have no target reader or planned direction for this to take, I just need an outlet for my ADD-fueled ramblings.
Lets start with that. ADD. I know that it's a popular opinion that ADD is over diagnosed and used as a excuse for everything from inappropriate comments to laziness. I share this opinion. I always thought that ADD was just an excuse people made for their bad parenting or lack of self control, but when I was diagnosed with it about a year ago, my opinion changed. Somewhat.
When I mentioned that I thought I may have ADD to my doctor, she laughed and said, "Ya think?" I laughed then, but thinking about it now, it may have been a somewhat unprofessional response on her part. She handed me a 7 page questionnaire and told me to answer the questions and bring it back next time. I laughed at that too. Seriously? I tell you I can't focus on mundane tasks and that I am easily distracted, so you hand me a pile of papers to set aside somewhere and forget about until 5 minutes before I am supposed to leave for the appointment to discuss them? ...OK...
I ultimately ended up answering the questions and returning with them a week later. She read them and determined that I would benefit from some form of medication. I have tried several different combinations of medications to manage my symptoms, all of which create other symptoms. One made me so irritable that I contemplated running someone over with my car in the Wal-mart parking lot. (not in the normal road rage we all get kid of way, but in a homicidal, picturing my car squish a person kind of way)...Now I take a mood elevator with my meds. I think it's better this way.
I don't think any of the medicine I have tried so far works too well, I never remember to take it. But...now I can make a "valid" and medically supported excuse for myself when I make inappropriate comments or get too lazy to finish things I start. "Oh, SO sorry I left that huge mess, I got distracted, my ADD is super bad today!"...
I'm not saying that I don't focus better or sleep better on my medicine than I do not on my medicine. But, I'm never going to be a neat freak or a super organized person. I will always blurt things out and say what I think. That's me, and no amount of mood elevators or stimulant drugs will "fix" that.
